Mentor

As a mentor, whether it is within a business or a classroom or as a "life coach," it is always important to announce your "steps" (in an interview for example) clearly, forthrightly, and without prevarication.

I have always done that -- in all my "interviewing" in various jobs as a grants investigator, as a background checker, and as a teacher.  Sometimes employees or interviewees are so "taken" or "excited" that they fail to hear correctly. When I announce that I have to ask invasive questions -- I would always give my reasoning. That is the "honor code" of a teacher, a life coach, a mentor, and a friend.

I have only had one example in my entire life as a teacher, leader, mentor and friend (52 years of service) of someone who so confusedly misconstrued my motives that they "warned me never to do it again."  People are always entitled to their opinions, even when they are wrong. The example was very, very recent -- and it involves basic self-delusion on the part of the individual being interviewed. I believe there is nothing I could have done differently, and nothing I should have done differently, and nothing that I would have done differently. I swear on my life that this is the "truth" as I see it.

If there is disagreement -- the two people involved should both "walk away" -- which I did and urged the interviewee to do as well.  I wish this person "good luck" always.