Well, Cosmopolitan Magazine has finally come out with its cover story on "sex tips for lesbians"-- aren't we all proud of that barrier being broken? What does it mean when a popular women's magazine (sic) actually begins to acknowledge their hitherto held stereotype of all women everywhere just might be incomplete -- by inference.
Soon we should all be following handbooks, tantric guides, and television-inspired listings on "how to succeed in our sex lives!" Could I have that on DVD please? Or perhaps "on demand?" Or maybe
"on my Pinterest page?" Yikes.
Sex is now deemed to be so "unnatural" that it cannot be left to mere instinct; desire, love, intimacy --- are no longer enough!!! It's time to get out the big guns -- we have health and fitness guides from every celebrity alive, why not "sex guides" from the same people? Why aren't we asking Harrison Ford how he "gets it on" in his 70's? Who better that Meryl Streep to guide us in our love/sex problems? Or maybe Barbara Streisand for all the closeted among us? Or Matt Lauer? Or ... or ... or?
Thursday, July 31, 2014
Wednesday, July 30, 2014
Sex and Non-Clerical Celibacy
More and more people are alone -- they have chosen not to marry, not to have a partner, to subsist on occasional sex-capades, and to remain -- in effect -- celibate!
Some of the Baby Boomer crowd become "cat people" (crazy old ladies with cats or crazy old men with cats/dogs); some just drift into a solipsistic kind of lifestyle. Some of the younger (men and women in their late 20's or early 30's) just get frustrated by the burned-out dating pool existent nowadays and deem themselves asexual, or non-functioning sexual, or "alone by choice;" some others actually live with someone -- apparently to have an excuse to kvetch and carp, or to remain alone while together, or to simply wait for "make-up sex" (see sex-capades above).
The only group still "doing it" are high schoolers (where the "drama" fits their lifestyles) or senior citizens (after all, who can stop them now?).
What's wrong with sex? What's wrong with us? Are relationships that impossible to maintain? (No wonder birth rates are falling in the US!)
Some of the Baby Boomer crowd become "cat people" (crazy old ladies with cats or crazy old men with cats/dogs); some just drift into a solipsistic kind of lifestyle. Some of the younger (men and women in their late 20's or early 30's) just get frustrated by the burned-out dating pool existent nowadays and deem themselves asexual, or non-functioning sexual, or "alone by choice;" some others actually live with someone -- apparently to have an excuse to kvetch and carp, or to remain alone while together, or to simply wait for "make-up sex" (see sex-capades above).
The only group still "doing it" are high schoolers (where the "drama" fits their lifestyles) or senior citizens (after all, who can stop them now?).
What's wrong with sex? What's wrong with us? Are relationships that impossible to maintain? (No wonder birth rates are falling in the US!)
Tuesday, July 29, 2014
Uncertainty
? Not being sure? Being unsure? Being lost? Being alone? Being confused? Being near the end? Just starting and not knowing? Being left out? Being unappreciated? Being without ... hope? Being without...love? Being without? Being outside? Not knowing the endgame? Not appreciating the process? Not seeing the forest...nor the trees?
Being single? Being singular? Being in doubt? Living on ... anyway? Seeking the truth? Doubting? Trusting in the depths that are human character? Asking the wrong questions? Asking the wrong person? Asking the unaskable? Never appreciating the simplicity of the answers? Wanting more? Failing to heed one's own warnings? Failing to see the signs? Working in the wrong direction? Working for the wrong purpose? For the wrong people? For the wrong ideals? For the wrong man?
For the wrong woman? For the wrong god? ???
Being single? Being singular? Being in doubt? Living on ... anyway? Seeking the truth? Doubting? Trusting in the depths that are human character? Asking the wrong questions? Asking the wrong person? Asking the unaskable? Never appreciating the simplicity of the answers? Wanting more? Failing to heed one's own warnings? Failing to see the signs? Working in the wrong direction? Working for the wrong purpose? For the wrong people? For the wrong ideals? For the wrong man?
For the wrong woman? For the wrong god? ???
Monday, July 28, 2014
Why Men Give Up!
While I was working as Associate Director of Hospice Savannah Foundation, an esteemed Board Member and contributor to Hospice lost his wife of many years to cancer. He was an architect/developer and quite wealthy. Since his personal situation mirrored mine only a few years later I watched as he carefully poured himself back into work, avoided the many females who wanted to "comfort" him, and reimagined his life as one of service and success.
I had done the same -- even though due to different circumstances, I had tried to date. Tried and failed -- because I either "picked people" for the wrong reasons (they were empathetic or I knew them to be kind), or I was convinced that a relationship "again" would be the answer. Now I think, after several years, I see and know the answer. Men give up on women because later in life women have already given up on men! They have lived without them for long enough, or substituted small furry animals for them (see previous post), that they know longer think they need them. They opt instead of images of satisfaction and/or mechanical ones.
Love forsaken is love forsworn! Love forsworn is the natural outcome of love forsaken!
I had done the same -- even though due to different circumstances, I had tried to date. Tried and failed -- because I either "picked people" for the wrong reasons (they were empathetic or I knew them to be kind), or I was convinced that a relationship "again" would be the answer. Now I think, after several years, I see and know the answer. Men give up on women because later in life women have already given up on men! They have lived without them for long enough, or substituted small furry animals for them (see previous post), that they know longer think they need them. They opt instead of images of satisfaction and/or mechanical ones.
Love forsaken is love forsworn! Love forsworn is the natural outcome of love forsaken!
Crazy Old Cat Ladies
Women with cats -- often equals women without men. Why? Perhaps the indefinable mystery that lies at the root of a cat's brain simulates that of a reluctant man? Perhaps the cat's seeming independence, odd behavior, and merciless "running around at night" -- recalls the similar behaviors in a male.Whatever!
All I know is that as a widower the two women I have dated in their 50's are both "cat ladies" and both have strayed so far from what I would consider normal behavior as human beings, that they have infringed upon the time-honored image of "crazy old ladies with cats." I remember as a young newspaperboy delivering the Milwaukee Sentinel more than a half century ago that there was a woman on my route like that -- except that she had many, many cats. Most of them were orange tabbies and most of them resided on her front porch for three seasons of the year, and then cried unremittingly indoors during the wintry months. These cats were inscrutable, seemingly malevolent, and downright scary. As was the woman!
Cats perhaps "do that" to women without normal gender connections!
All I know is that as a widower the two women I have dated in their 50's are both "cat ladies" and both have strayed so far from what I would consider normal behavior as human beings, that they have infringed upon the time-honored image of "crazy old ladies with cats." I remember as a young newspaperboy delivering the Milwaukee Sentinel more than a half century ago that there was a woman on my route like that -- except that she had many, many cats. Most of them were orange tabbies and most of them resided on her front porch for three seasons of the year, and then cried unremittingly indoors during the wintry months. These cats were inscrutable, seemingly malevolent, and downright scary. As was the woman!
Cats perhaps "do that" to women without normal gender connections!
Thursday, July 24, 2014
Humbled by Knowledge
Every time I learn, I grow and diminish at the same time. I grow in understanding, information, and even in making connections between/among facts, people, things, etc. I diminish in my strength of mind to grasp it all -- to put everything in its place -- to comprehend and see the meaning in everything.
I am human -- and am limited in being humbly and stupidly finite. I am small where even largeness would succumb to despair at its place in the "more and more largeness" of structures beyond myself.
I am at least large enough to know that I am not the largest, and small enough to grasp that I must and can still grow larger.
I am human -- and am limited in being humbly and stupidly finite. I am small where even largeness would succumb to despair at its place in the "more and more largeness" of structures beyond myself.
I am at least large enough to know that I am not the largest, and small enough to grasp that I must and can still grow larger.
Wednesday, July 23, 2014
Finding a Job
Just interviewed a "young professional" today as a possible new teacher at STC. Since he was on staff already in another area I was letting him know about the contents of this course he might be asked to teach (EMPL 1000).
I had to give him his cover letter and his resume/CV back because both contained major errors: the cover letter was actually to another person at another school for a different position, the CV had a major error misnaming where he was working now (which happened to be the name of our institution). Yikes.
How can you teach a course in being professional when you yourself are not same? How indeed?
I had to give him his cover letter and his resume/CV back because both contained major errors: the cover letter was actually to another person at another school for a different position, the CV had a major error misnaming where he was working now (which happened to be the name of our institution). Yikes.
How can you teach a course in being professional when you yourself are not same? How indeed?
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