#Me Too?

I believe that every grown woman in America could probably use the above hashtag, and tell a number of stories about how/where/when she was grabbed, groped, touched, kissed (without desiring it), harassed, used, abused, and on and one. But would all the stories and memories be true? When a person has an incident like all of these  -- are all of them accurate and real memories.

As a man I now realize that as a very young man I may have gone "too far" in pursuing a girl, held some people too close (who could not tell me they didn't want it), or just plain misunderstood certain signals and then had to be "rebuffed" to understand what was happening. I can honestly say now, however, that to my knowledge (memory, recollection, and conscience being what they are) I do not believe I have ever given unwarranted attention to a female (or a male for that matter). I have never gone too far. I have never not stopped when it became apparent that "NO" was the operative concept.

Are there women in my life who would disagree with this -- I don't think so, but maybe. I always had ironclad behavioral rules about students -- "don't ever touch, pursue, or trap in any way a woman while she is your student." I believe that is an "ethos" error -- a flaw in character, even though I have seen it happen many times. I also have rules about relationships -- "don't push any relationship if there is 'push-back'! Even now when I try to get a "relationship going" with someone -- if they show signs of "no thank you" -- no matter how small; I retreat and go in another direction.

So for all the women out there -- I apologize for all of us men who have "gone too far" or in some way hurt you. Both men and women need to establish the rules of their own encounters -- if it is a "tinder" date, so be it. If it is a "church supper" date -- so be it. If it is a chance encounter date -- play it by ear, but don't "push" if there is "push-back."

And continue to  RESIST!